Have you guys seen the movie Sex Tape yet? With Cameron Diaz + Jason Segel – both whom we adore. If you haven’t – go rent it [if you are into inappropriate movies] and then read this post. If you read this posts title and assumed Dan and I released our latest collaboration, you’ve been mistaken.
Today, I’m talking about marriage. Honestly, this could apply to long-term relationships in general – but in my case it’s marriage. In Sex Tape – it revolves around a couple trying to get back to the way things used to be between them in the beginning of their relationship. As a last resort to spice things up they come up with the idea to make a sex tape – in hopes to bring the zest back into their love lives.
Of course being a movie it’s a bit over the top, but, it really spoke to me – and no we did not make a sex tape.
Dan and I have been together since we were 17 years old — Now at the ripe young age of 28 I can say that quite a bit has changed.
Our SITUATIONS have changed.
Our RELATIONSHIP has changed.
WE have changed.
Our LIVES have changed.
When we first met we were school kids completely drooling over one another. Dan couldn’t keep his hands off of me and I as well. PDA was a given – over the top at times I am sure. We said “I love you” within two weeks of dating. Which sound ridiculously fast to some, but we really truly did – and I do not think we ever second guessed our future together.
Fast forward to when Dan went away to college and I was back home tackling hair school + working full-time – our situations definitely changed. Long distance was not my cup of tea. Dan was having a blast living the college life and I remember being so worried he would find someone better. I was far from a party girl – so I feared he would find someone who was more into the night life than I.
We spent that two years with me going down to see Dan after I got off of work late saturday nights – the excitement was SO high to see each other all of the time. His time home was so thrilling + the long distance was as equally scary as amazing. That is the time in our relationship where I had true jealously – being a girl and worrying all the darn time. It took me a while to realize that even after “seeing what was out there” he still chose me.
I moved to Columbus to start my hair career there and move in with Dan. It was such a whirlwind of a time. Living together for the first time and working at an amazing salon. Our relationship changed. We loved deeply and bickered a ton. Our relationship was full of highs and lows – it was the best year and worst year all wrapped into one. It was a time when we actually realized how much our dynamic had changed over the long distance span of two years. Not for the worse, just different than what it had been. It was the first time I think we both fully understood the meaning of “growing together”. We were falling deeper in love by the minute –
When the dust settled and our wild experience of being newbies living together came to an end – we moved back to Cleveland to start new jobs. It was really exciting – and so comforting to see how we made it through that past year even stronger. Just two shy months of being back home we found out we were expecting. Very quickly we were swept off of our feet at 22 years old- just starting off in our new jobs and realizing that we had ALOT of things to do to get ready for a baby. No, we did not feel ready. We wanted an engagement – a wedding – thriving careers and then a baby. Life threw us through a loop.
Fast forward to nearly 6 years later + two amazing little kids. I have no idea where the time has gone. We’ve had our struggles – emotionally, physically, financially. Somehow – over the years our relationship has grown stronger and stronger. It amazes me to see how far we have come and the family we have created. WE have changed. Starting a relationship off at a very young age can be the biggest blessing – it also pushed us through so many life changes to go through together it threw us through many ups and downs.
OUR LIVES are so much better because of each other. Dan and I have never more connected than we are now. Our love for one another is so much deeper than that puppy love we had at 17 – yet at the same time I feel just as smitten with him as I did then.
Marriage is not easy. Relationships require work. Both of us understand the attention and compassion it takes to keep our relationship going strong. We are not the same people we were over ten years ago. We’ve been knocked down. Seen each other at their absolute worse – held onto each other during the toughest of times and shared in the joy with each other during the best.
My goodness – Dan has seen me give birth – twice. Any husband that has seen their wife in that moment and still wants to sleep with you weeks after is a true testament to love.
I know our relationship is far from perfect, but as difficult as it is to face the tough times it is 10x as rewarding to come out stronger on the other end.
So no matter how much our situations, relationship, our lives or we have changed – I am forever grateful for our commitment to bring out the best in one another.
Marriage is sacred. Dan and I have a long road ahead of us. So what – were not making out on a park bench like we did when we were younger – we have evolved, we’d rather makeout after a 3 hour reality show marathon.
Through the highs and lows – our marriage is forever. I do not wish to speed up time – but I am perfectly okay with getting old and wrinkly with this guy. Maybe 60 years from now we’ll run out of ways to spice things up and then well to do doing a sex tape.
Absolutely kidding. Or am I?